No Idea, No Direction

I am beginning to realize that I blog for my own amusement! I enjoy reading my own thoughts out loud. I have really good ideas and I guess I want to share them with the world or the other 12 people who have accidentally come across this blog because I used Adam Lambert as a tag hehe! I am a big dork and that's one of my good assets.

I am a political person and find myself very much interested in today's politics. I also love entertainment stuff and love to discuss that. I really am that guy you go to and ask...which Darren came first on 'Bewitched'? Then I look you sternly in the eyes as to say "WTF?" Then proceed to answer with Dick York who was latter replaced by Dick Seargent. I also like to mention how Will Ferrel was not a good choice to play Darren in the theatrical adaptation. Then I grumble about 'MASH' and take out a cigarette to pretend to smoke.

Today Gottchalks, a Macy-like department store located here in California, has entered into bankruptcy. This company is over 100 years old. It is a mainstay in our community. I will miss it. This is where I was introduced to Calvin Klein underwear and Tommy Hilfiger cologne. Or was it the other way around? Both? I don't know, I am lost in the emotional side of this.

Well I guess Id be more upset to lose K-Mart, it hurt that Martha Stewart has less items at the store...I have moved on. Anyways Jacklyn Smith has done K-Mart and me well. I am watching 'Still Standing' on Lifetime and after seeing these episodes over and over I am still chuckling...Oh man Reba is up next hehe! I am still in shock with Golden Girls no longer being on Lifetime. Weird, what happened to The Nanny? I am really off track now. Murphy Brown anyone? Where can I watch this? Buy this? I need a group, a sponsor...I'm feeling faint!

So I guess that means this is becoming a ramble...I so had a point to this blog...oh well its not like anyone is reading this. American Idol tonight...wonder what Adam will be singing???

Reality vs. Fantasy...In a Steel Cage Matchup!

In days like this you have to keep your friends close and your enemies closer. I have found it confusing to keep these people apart. I have found myself texting friends and enemies the same "I love you" song thingy. This also makes my enemies think I like them which I don't! I mean I barely like my friends hehe! No offense, but deal with it!

I hate decided to tag people. I have the "best friend", I have "The most hated friend", there is "clever friend", "funny friend", "Hilarious friend", "Hot friend", "Hot enemy", "Friend I'd like to &$%@" and "Enemy I'd like to &$%@"! I know I know...who &$%@ their enemies? I do!

I was watching 'Two and a Half Men' when I thought to myself...why? So I turned it and found WWE! They are preparing to have Wrestlmania 25. This is huge, they have made it to 25! This event must be huge cause they are adding a whole hour to it. I know, right! This means you are getting 4 hours at the price of 3, I guess.

They have many stars...Randy Orton, Tripple H, Undertaker, Shawn Michaels, JBL, Ric Flair, Chris Jericho and many many more. Vince McMahon has made such a great product. He has made a sport that is built around wrestling drama. Which is really all we want. Id love to see Victor Newman and Jack Abbot go at it in a steel cage on 'The Young and the Restless'! Who would win, I don't know.

There are also divas. These ladies go around in bra and panties and wrestle eachother to turn us all on. They will be involved in a 25 woman battle royal...I'd love to see Nikki Newman, Jill Foster, Phyliss Newman, Lauren Baldwin, and more in a battle royale in the Athletics Club. I am amazed that they have yet to do this. We'd love to see a brawl in the middle of Indigo between Karen and Tyra. If you don't watch Y&R or WWE then you are lost, but then you really need to...here's your invitation!

These shows are an outlet to get lost and leave what had become a terrible world where bailouts and CEO are bad words. These are my new enemies...politicians and bankers. My friends are wrestlers and actors hehe! Oh how we need to sometimes take ourselves out of reality and enter fantasy cause as we all know reality is always there to ruin everything anyways, just look at Real World!

Upgrades, Likes and Dislikes

Computer upgrades can be a bitter sweet situation. They are suppose to make life better and more enjoyable as they improve your pc's performance, but sometimes they are annoying. They interrupt your tasks and even request multiple times if they can restart your computer. You know sometimes I want to just surf the web, make a bid on ebay and watch a youtube video before Im bombarded with new updates!

I watched Duplicty and it was a joy to watch. You might want to take notes when you watch as I heard numerous people had a hard time following, but they were more upset cause Last House On The Left was full. I enjoyed myself and renewled my love affair with Julia Roberts. I even found myself attracted to Clive Owen, who before this, was NOT on my radar!

I love mangos a little too much! I decided that I could live off of mangos if I needed to, but I could not live without them. So I find myself buying liquer with mango flavor. Is there like a Pepsi Mango? I know I know...mango isn't the awesome thing I make it out to be, but I love it, I love it, I love!

I also love my Blackjack 2 (red), I am up for an upgrade, but I don't know...I really love my Blackjack. It's the second one Ive owned and I still use my old one a little back up black book hehe! I thought about a blackberry pearl or curve, but they don't woooo me like the blackjack...well will see!

I could really go for a Dr. Pepper and some Cheez-its right now, lol!

Random Thoughts

The nights are cold, but the days are warm, I hate that. The wind feels good, but the dust is annoying. I have dirt in my eyes and my allergies are going wild. I like vitamin C. It's almost an addiction...no Twitter is an addiction. My neighbor is stalking me. I might fight fire with fire. Does anyone have a match? I feel dirty oh so dirty. I'm writing this after I worked out and I'm sweaty. I bought new undies, they are trunks and I like them. They make me feel free. I have lost 32 pounds and most importantly 3 inches. I fit pants I haven't fit in. I'm really motivated and cheese cake has no more hold on me. I'm sorry cheese cake I still love you...we just need to see other people for awhile. Oprah is losing weight, were losing weight together. Hehe!Republicans are really digging themselves a huge hole. They really seem to be playing playground politics. They forget that the people are waiting for responsibility. Bush is gone and they have to stand on their own. Mission Accomplished, were in debt. I'm in debt...just send our debt to debt consolidation and get our debt negotiated down. These guys are awesome. I saved a lot. I also once saved a gold fish. Well I did scoop it out of its tank, but I put Schwimmy back in his tank. Thus I call that a save hehe!I'm burping up my vitamin C that I took a few minutes ago. Better take another so I know it's working. Oh I will Twitter about this, Oh and write a blog for MySpace, Oh and a note on Facebook...yeah me I have too much crap online. I'm becoming Perez Hilton...ewww, ewww~! I would hate me! I do hate me!So what happening with you? Yes you? This paragraph is especially for you! Did you see High School Reunion? I did and now I wish I hadn't. Drama, to say the least. How about American Idol? Adam is really good huh? I also like Kris, what do you think? Really? I disagree and thats fine cause were friends. Oh really? Well were done! Don't talk to me no more! I'm sulking now in my dispair so now is not the time to make nice! I'll be fine! Oh and this paragraph wasn't just for you! I hate you!This paragraph is for everyone else. I don't see why people have to be such bullies. My mom always said bullies are insecure, but they look pretty secure when they try to make you do things. I mean bad things. I feel dirty! I'm dry now. Global warming sucks and so do teleprompters. Why can't Obama just do it freestyle? Reagan did and he was cool. I still here his voice, weird huh? I know! He's the bully! Well him and Bill O'Reilly! I hate him, he makes me feel dirty!Well thats all for now, its my turn with the bong heheheheheeeee! Is that a lion on my bed? Roar, grrrr! Give my best to Mariam ya'll!!SAS Newsletter 2009

I am Rejuvenated!

Oh how I feel my life is not complete. I mean I have wanted to do so much. I have always wanted to do theatre. I have always wanted to dabble in comedy writing. I have always wanted to make my own sex tape. Ok Ok the last one was...done a few years ago, but I wasn't happy with the solo job! Plus I used a stunt double.

I have really been upset with the days news. Obama's Trillion doallar stimulus to buy up toxic debt, Octo-mom's children ruining our well fare services, and the fact that Cloris Leechman is returning to Dancing With The Stars which is byfar the most devastating of all these news.

I am really tired of all this Dick Chenney talk and why is he still alive. I thought we took the vp behind back and shot them during the parade. I mean Obama should have made a crass statement about Chenney and not special olympic children. Where was his teleprompter at that moment! Hehe! Should have done Letterman lol!

I guess Letterman said it best when he said nothing at all. Leno moves to 10pm soon which will be great since I don't watch him at 11:35 I will now not watch him at 10:00pm! I will however find myself staying up longer to watch Jimmy Fallon. He's cute and funny too. My kind of guy. Obama will pre-emp Idol tomorrow night and all The Adam fans will ofcourse lower Obama's approval rating come Wednesday morning. I bet it happens hehe!

Well I took a vacation from blogging and I am refreshed as I guess I can ever be. Oh well. I have a stalker nieghbor guy and some young guy flirting with me on the internet so I guess what I am trying to say is how excited I am about a new episode of The Mentalist tomorrow night!

Oh How I Loathe Newscorp

I was enjoying the night. I was outside in the fresh California air. It was so peacefull and relaxing. There I was feeling the crisp cool air against my skin. It was rejuvenating and not in the way I feel after putting on moisturizers. No it was like a renewel of my mind. I took numerous deep breaths as if I was clearing out my lungs. Then it hit me...

I was taking the trash out and all this enhaling is causing me to black out. I dumped the trash and came back home just to find out that my mother locked me out of my very own house! This was sad. I thought to myself why would she do this. My mom is such a sweet lady, but a bit ditzy. In this case she was extremely ditzy! Thank God that ditz left a window open.

So after giving her 5 minute guilt trip I was off to my office to check my Twitter and MySpace when I realized that an innocent link I left on my MySpace was disabled by MySpace and the Fox' parent company Newscorp! Why would they do such an evil thing? Is it because im to the left of them, was it the abgry e-mail I left for Greta Van Susteren? Oh well they disabled it and accused it of being spam. Yes I sent spam to myself! Dumb ass!

So now Im annoyed and debating on Youtubing a anti Fox and MySpace video and then posting it on MySpace hehe! I will Twitter it though...my hatred. I mean if I had to do all my stuff through Facebook I'd be lost. I don't understand or like Facebook one bit. Id like have to relearn all my friends. Did you ever notice how some of your friends are one way on MySpace and another on Facebook? I have...

I mean thats funny cause it's just a click away from one site to another. I can easily go straight from one to another and see how you went from a conservative on Facebook to a silly liberal on myspace while being a deviant on Twitter, and your porn video on Xtube is unacceptable...you know who you are! Or do you? Or do you?

In the end I am fine now, I just needed to come blog about it here on Blogger instead of on MySpace or adding a note to Facebook! Oh the irony!

A Night In Italy With Harvey Milk

So I found myself tonight celebrating my dear friend trish's birthday at Olive Garden. Being Italian I find myself right at home. I had lasagna and it was delicious. I also found myself sampling wine and enjoying too much the taste of mango-strawberry frozen margarita! I had a few too many and found myself being very flirtive with the waitor. I tipped him well for the trouble hehe!

I also found myself locking eyes with this handsome lad at the table next to me. He'd look over at me and I looked up and he'd look away. He was with what I assume was his girlfriend. She was pretty cute, but after numerous flashing smiles and eyebrow lifts(I was tipsy)! He gave me a nice smile as this girl looked down to retrieve her purse.

They joked around about paying "halfsies" and he even called it "dutch", which is what Ive always called it myself. So I thought hmm they are friends. So they walked away and I thought I'd get a peek at his butt. So as I very slyly turned my head.....we once again locked eyes where he smiled, but he was holding her hand. Interesting to say the least!

This brought up numerous questions to my buzzed head. Was he in the closet? Was he just a friendly guy? Why do I only flirt when drunk? Well to say the least I enjoyed my evening. The waitor was cute and the whole time he discussed anything he made eye contact with me which had to be a challenge cause I was wondering the room like a health inspector looking for mold.

Trish had a great time and we soon came home to my place to watch 'Milk' with Nia, my other best friend. This movie was awesome and I found myself revited and disturbed and proud. I was in complete awe of Sean Penn and his acting ability on this film. He became Harvey Milk. I really think this film was worthy of the oscar, no offense 'Slumdog Millionaire'! So as I listen to Rihanna and my favorite song from her album...'Reloaded' "Take A Bow" I too will bid farewell for now! I need to sober up for a busy day tomorrow!

It's A Twitter Nation With A MySpace Attitude

It all started about 3 years ago. I had fought it for a very long time. They told me to embrace it, but I couldn't. I made excuses when people asked if I had. I would shy away when it was discussed. I even would change the subject and spin the conversation from it. I was hiding a very serious issue.

Then it happened, I created a social site. I joined Myspace and was overwhelmed by it as soon as I recieved my first friend. Soon it was intoxicating. I could actually reconnect with old friends and make new friends all at the same time and without leaving my recliner! Cool, neat stuff right there!

I soon was making blogs and posting pics of me in the bathroom with my camera phone. I was becoming a high tech fool. I tried and tried to keep it to this, but now im on Facebook and I Twitter, I Twitter like Ashton Kutcher, Demi Moore and Punky Brewster. I am now even on this Blogger.com thing writing this for all 3 of us to read hehe!

I know I know, this is what the world is coming to. You can live 3,000 miles apart, but be just a click away. Your phone is more then just a phone call, its a text, a photo album, it a status update tool and now I Twitter off it like thats what it was meant for all along...and it was! Over to your left you can join me on MySpace and follow me on Twitter. Now Ive even started a youtube channel and upload videos too.

What has happened to me. I was this conservative kid who was prim and proper. If I said something crude people were shocked and Id apologize. Now Im non apologetic liberal guy from a conservative community, but don't worry I still love George Strait! This is really a crazy ride I have started and who knows where it could lead...hopefully not prison like my brother!

You know Im Twittering as I type this blog and update my status on MySpace and facebook. I might upload a video on youtube showing me multi tasking all of this at once. how many views is that worth? Maybe if I speed the video up and make my voice high pitch hehe! Well got to go...I just recieved a direct message from Adam Lambert and I have to reply hehe!

Idol Sex Appeal

Oh how great it is to be an American Idol fan right now. The show has it all right now. There are 12 awesome singers and one sanjaya. It oh so devilishly fun. I found myself tapping my feet with some, dancing with others and laughing at a few. The whole night was capped off by my growing infactuation with Adam Lambert and my school girl crush on Kris Allen. These two are very different. Lambert is what Archuleta was to last season while Allen reminds me of a clean shaven Jason castro who won my heart last year!

I voted 100 times for Mr. Lambert and just 25 times for Kris. I feel like Kris is the type of guy you bring home to the parents, sit on the porch with and share a soda pop while swinging, yes swinging on one of those swinging bench thingies they have in the south. Adam is the one you just have a really good time with and I mean a really good time.

I know I know...this sounds weird, but I like to get intimate with my Idols so Im attached to them. That way when they are voted off like Castro last year I cry like a little 4th grader when he learns that the cute girl thinks he is a dork! Oh how I dislike Sarah Gonzalez hehe!

The them for the idols was Michael Jackson and Adam chose 'Black and White' he made that song pop more then the king of pop did. He used his looks to lure you into his performance then he throws you off to the side like a cheap trick. Which isn't always bad in the dating world, no commitment, no strings, and ice cream! lol!

Kris unfortunately I can't remember his song choice, but I enjoyed him. I really did. He has a great vocal and as he plays the guitar he wraps you up in his charm and you smile, you smile not just on the outside, but on the inside as well. In the end you wipe the drull from your lip and realize the whole family was watching you watch him...creepy right? Well in the end Lambert has this down as a lock and Allen is along for the ride, but who are we kidding...Adam lambert does not need American Idol...he will get a contract so will the viewers sense this and try to give another a chance? I hope not cause I like how Adam is dominant and thats saying much cause this is season is pretty damn good.

Not like the year it was not dramatic at all with Deanna DiGarmo(fellow Italian) and Fantasia Barone(Not Italian, but her last name is). That season was dull and my pick is now an Academy Award nominee, and grammy winner. Oh I meant to mention her name Jennifer hudson. I did vote for DiGarmo cause she reminded me of my ex who I liked still at that time...bitch!

I also hope Clay Aiken comes back this season and sings so we can see the new gay version of Aiken(Sarcasm filled people)! Maybe once he is done singing the judges can use their line item veto and allow him to stay and try to win the crown he was robbed from in season 2. Where is that teddy bear at anyways? Hehe!

In the end I was saddened by the departure of Jorge. That Newt guy should have been bumped, but being the unlucky 13 has shown him luck on this night. As Jorge sang goodbye leaving his fate up to the judges. They said "No, Nope!" to the wide eye Puerto Ruican. His attitude and personality is what you root for and we move on to next week. Finally the Top 12 can begin lol!

I Am Gonna Make It After All...

I just read some exciting news, well exciting to me I guess! 20th Century Fox has finally pulled their heads out of their collective asses and are going to release The Mary Tyler Moore Show: The Complete Series on DVD! I am going to advance order tonight!

The Mary Tyler Moore show ran from 1970-1977 and won a total of 29 Emmys. That was a record until Frasier stole that crown by lasting like 11 years, but Mare did it in just 7! lol! I was so troubled and frustrated when Fox ended production on dvd set sell for Mary after only 4 seasons. I was just heartbroken.

I mean the last 3 season were the years that MTM won best comedy at the emmys. For such a groundbreaking show how could they just stop? I mean Oprah freaking Winfrey said that this show was an inspiration to her. She wanted to be Mary Richards and so did I! Stop laughing!

So now I can see the great episodes like "Chuckles Bites the Dust" and "Lou Dates Mary" won of my best. These were also the years where Mare moved to the apartment. John Ritter made his tv debut as well as Helen Hunt. These are also the years where Rhoda left to do that other show I forget what it was called! lol!

So Fox did something right, best decision since bringing Family Guy back hehe! I can't wait for May 5th! You know this show was on Nick@Nite when I was young whipper snapper. I use to watch her every night. I basically grew up watching this show as if it was on first run. I wouldn't miss an episode and no matter how many times I had seen an episode I watched it again and again, kinda how I am with Murder, She Wrote...the murderers still suprise me hehe!

I use to wish that Mary Richards could be my mother and that hurt my mother some, but Id always look mom in the eyes, smile and say...suck it up chica! I use to imagine that I had a sitcom and my mom would either be Mary Tyler Moore or Candace Bergen, cause I love me some Murphy Brown hehe! Oh how it would be such a hit! Id win an Emmy which I have always wanted, that and a Tony.

Then after a successful 11 year run we'd have 9 seasons be released on dvd just for Fox to stop, wait 3 years and release a box set containing the last 2 seasons hehe! Well atleast ill have my Mare...she really could turn the world on with her smile!

Random Thoughts

I love tax time. I mean only because I get money and get to go buy stuff to make myself feel better. Vodka anyone? Hehe!



I am really just trying to replace stuff thats broken, breaking or just plain not so cool anymore. lol! So I decide to go to my bank's website so I can review my account and see what I have in there when I see a message...Temporary not in service while they do routine maitainence. This was frustrating since I bank with Washington Mutual. They are getting bailouts and they can afford to do maintainence? Thats troubling!





So now who knows when I will be able to ever see my account, what if they are closing up shop and running to the virgin islands? I would transfer my money to my other bank, yeah I have two to make me feel rich, Bank of America! They are also getting bailouts and fruit baskets from the government! I asked for a fruit basket and recieved a Paul Lynde dvd set!





I decided to chance it and buy some stuff to make my soul whole. I am really addicted to ebay and I love the thrill to bid and bid often. I bid for weird eclectic things like a singing turkey or a cowboy santa. I am bad when it comes to ebay! Hehe!





I am inlove with my 32" Sony Bravia flat panel lcd tv. Letting go never felt so good...sorry Tony!







Hehe So our troops are coming home in August 2010. Thats a start, but lets try sooner Mr. Obama so maybe we can fix this defecit...then we can work on mine. I know what a great stimulus package would be...Cheeze-Its and a Dr. Pepper...while watching David Lettermen, but thats just me hehe!





Vodka, that really sounds good hehe!





I am really excited about the new baseball season. My Giants look bad, but I am still going to San Francisco to see em lose. AT&T Park is a must see!





You know vodka can really be the answer to anything...



My back hurts...vodka!



I have a stain on my blouse...vodka!



I have a paper cut...vodka!



My truck wont start...vodka!



I just lost my job...vodka!



I don't mean to use it on things, but to drink it when problems arise hehe! Well Id be drunk!

Hi, My Name Is...

Hi, my name is Scott Ashley Smith and this is my blog. A place for me to give my opinion and insight on things going on that effect me. I think I will call this the !SAS Newsletter!

The idea of this is for me to allow my inner thoughts a place to live. My therapist said this would be constructive and not destructive, I sure hope I got that right!

I live in the great state of California. You know liberal ideas and sunshine all the time...well I live in the forgotten part of California. This place is called the San Joaquin Valley aka: The Central Valley! We are basically Nebraska in the middle of New York City hehe!

I was once a comedian who did christian comedy, but they get so righteous once you make fun of them. So I decided to not do that anymore lol! Well now I don't have to. I will continue to be the observationalist that God made me to be hehe!

Growing up in the valley you learn that were pretty conservative and to be liberal here is like coming out of the closet, so if you gay and a liberal then its not fun at all...trust me hehe! Living here will suck any ambitions you have...you have to just put your foot down and go for them.

I just hope Im not too late!

Well I hope you enjoy my blogs as you discover me and I discover myself and maybe just maybe will discover each other...just not in a restroom! So if sarcasm isn't for you...well you came to the wrong place, but for everyone else...come, stay awhile!